Day 129.......Is Grace jealously awaiting my surrender?

1 Peter 5:5 (New Living Translation)

5  In the same way, you younger men must accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, serve each other in humility, for

“God opposes the proud

but favors the humble.”[a]

James 4:5-7 (New Living Translation)

5 What do you think the Scriptures mean when they say that the spirit God has placed within us is filled with envy?[a] 6 But he gives us even more grace to stand against such evil desires. As the Scriptures say,

“God opposes the proud

but favors the humble.”[b]

7 So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Jonah 2:8 (New International Version)

8 "Those who cling to worthless idols

forfeit the grace that could be theirs.

Could this mean that if I am not submitting to God or my elders authority, God may be frustrating my situation due to my pride!  I have heard the saying, "surrender invites grace".

I Surrender !!!!!

I am learning that God has envy/jealousy for us.  He desires for us to know and seek only after Him.  He is our ultimate gift and He desperately wants us to continue on the path toward Him.  I watched the movie, The Ultimate Gift www.theultimategift.com/  then, came to a realization that God also puts us though a series of gifts (tests),  because His desire is for us to succeed in each gift to obtain the ulimate gift on earth which will only get better into our eternity.  What is the way to obtain it.....Surrender to His will, He is ready to lead us into His pefection, all it takes is surrender!  What's to lose, only the Ultimate Gift.  If you don't want it He won't force it, but He longs (envy/jealousy) for us to have it!   A Big Lesson, but to get it is the Ultimate!

1 Corinthians 10:21-23 (New International Version)

21 You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons too; you cannot have a part in both the Lord's table and the table of demons. 22 Are we trying to arouse the Lord's jealousy? Are we stronger than he?

The Believer's Freedom

23 "Everything is permissible"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible"—but not everything is constructive.

 

Lord, keep my thoughts on You, keep my actions Godly...Let me never arouse Your jealousy that You should oppose me....but let me always surrender to Your will and recieve your grace for my everyday circumstances. In Jesus name, Amen!

Day 126....My Tool Box

On weigh in day, I lost 2 lbs.  I realize that I have developed a wonderful tool box of great tools that work for me when used.  I just need to revisit my past posts and take a look at the tools that have helped me get this far.  I bit my nail off this last week, so I grabbed the ol' tool of dark nail polish (see Day 34 post), starting over is the perfect place to start.  In two weeks I will have long nails again.  I totally enjoyed Christmas and allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted as long as I did not over eat, I stopped when I was full.  I put my napkin on my plate and pushed it away (even when my plate still had food on it) WOW! (see Day 87 post).  Best of all I am in peace, God has given me a new level to dwell on and it has nothing to do with food.  I am no longer a slave under foods control.  Now, don't get me wrong.  I still love food, but it is in moderation because I know who I serve and who I want to think about and it is not food.  (see Day 107 post) 

Day 120......Stay on Track or Fall off Completely

On weigh in day I had gained 2.4 pounds. Ouch!  What I realized is my focus has not been on God this past week, it has been on my circumstances.  I needed to realize that if I lose my focus I will fall completely off the track. To stay on track I need to listen to my body signals and stop snacking when I am not hungry.   It is so easy to get caught up in daily insecurities, all the why, how and where's of lifes unknowns, but I am learning to give it ALL to God especially my thoughts. Then I need to trust that He is working out all the worrisome details for me, all I need to do is keep on being faithful and diligent in my discipline.  WoW!  I don't like set backs.  I am fighting feelings of failure and wanting to give up; however I have come so far.  God has shown up along the journey so many times, just to remind me, that He cares and wants me to keep Him my main focus.  Coincidently I am studying the Fruits of the Spirit with a book study group and I just read the chapter on Self Control.  Boy, did that one sting a bit! 

Galatians 5:17-18 (Amplified Bible)

17 For the desires of the flesh are opposed to the [Holy] Spirit, and the [desires of the] Spirit are opposed to the flesh (godless human nature); for these are antagonistic to each other [continually withstanding and in conflict with each other], so that you are not free but are prevented from doing what you desire to do

So in short, it is HARD!  Our only saving grace is....Philippians 4:13 (Amplified Bible)

13 I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who [a]infuses inner strength into me; I am [b]self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency].

I can do this, but I MUST tap into God's strength with a can do attitude, and with humility knowing that I can not do this alone.  God has to infuse me with His strength.  Also, the strength to not think.  I am my own worst critic, when I allow my thinking to be negative, so I must replace those negative thoughts with God's encouragement.  Encouragemant that reminds me that nothing is impossible with Him. 

Matthew 19:26 (Amplified Bible)

26 But Jesus looked at them and said, With men this is impossible, but all things are possible with God.

God understands that our flesh and spirit are at war.  He delights when we overcome the flesh with Self Control. The self control that produces fruit and where there is fruit there is a harvest.

Galatians 6:9 (Amplified Bible)

9 And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not loosen and relax our courage and faint.

Yeah.....Hope renewed!

Day 110......Weigh In

I lost .6 lbs.!  I am actually celebrating that I lost and did not gain.

Day 107........Pursue Peace

It is difficult to start something new, when your life is full already. It is double hard when that is topped with a difficult situation that takes your thinking in a million different directions.  I am in that place.  However, I am up this morning, just got off the treadmill and I am not going to think about anything until I am out of the shower and my first cup of coffee is in my hand.  This is how I am maintaining my discipline, by refusing to get so sidetracked that I lose the important things.   Calm in the mist of a storm, that is the definition of Peace, it is up to me to pursue it.

Week 15 Weigh In

I lost 2 lbs.!

Day 103.....God Tailor Fits My Journey

I am up and just got off the treadmill! 
My husbands employer implemented a wellness program with a monetary incentive to participate.  The old me would've been angry and insulted, but the new me wants to embrace the experience.  I went about a month ago to have the health screening with results that day.  I am healthy in every area except my BMI and Body composition.  I didn't need to be enlightened to that fact, but what is beneficial is they appoint a health coach to help bring the problem areas back into the healthy level.  I was remaining skeptical until the first  phone appointment with the health coach.  She called yesterday and we talked about 20 minutes. I am excited, my very nice health coach was an inspiration.  Now, here is the God thing.  I needed the freedom from food restraint for awhile so that God could rein me in for further discipline.  The great and awesome way that God is, He allowed me to continue to lose weight which shows me that changing my thoughts from food to God works.  I can and will always use that, but now I am convicted about the food in a verse I read.

James 4:17 (Amplified Bible)

17 So any person who knows what is right to do but does not do it, to him it is sin.

You see I know that to be healthy I have to eat healthy foods.  If I want to live a pleasing life to God then I need to take what I know and apply it.  The health coach is just what I need to refine my goal.  I will eat good healthy food, in thankfullness that God provides everything for me.  I will not overindulge or let food rule over me, but I have to eat the right food and learn what those foods are to know what is right.  Joyce Meyer descibes our journey under God's authority as labor pains.  True to my own labor and delivery with my babies for both I need to have the labor room tailor fit to me, the room needed to be cool, I needed to be mobile so I could move around or get in the bathtub, listen to music, have a support person, ect.   God knows me, He knows I need some breathing room in His labor pains of disciplining me.  That is why these103 days have not been a clear cut plan from start to finish, but a tailor fit journey full of adventure and excitement as well as hard "labor" pain, but I know the new improved, healthy me will be the baby born.

Day 101......That's a Lot of Dalmations!

I am up early and did my first Couch to 5K warm up podcast while on the treadmill. My legs are pulsating right now so I know something wonderful is happening. I look back at my journey and it is full of side tracks and off the beaten path treks, but I am so grateful that it is tailor fit for me. I am a person that needs things changed up and fresh, this journey is definately that. I am not thinking about the 10K. I am only keeping my focus on God and letting Him help me in the baby steps. Wow, 101 days and I am not even 1/3 of the way thru the year. That is a lot of dalmations.

Day 99......New Challenge

My sister has left.  She is on a very exciting adventure with the Holy Spirit. On the phone today, she talked to me while on the highway headed west toward the mountains, toward her hopes, her dreams, forging her journey in faith.  I made a commitment to her that I am going to trust that I can live up to.  She is planning on coming back to the midwest for a marathon in the spring.  She asked me to meet her there and run the 10K.  I said, yes!  I have 6 months to train.  My sister says, start off slowly and work your way up to running 3 miles everyother day, then add an extra mile each week.  Ha Ha Ha.  This all sounds so out of reach right now;however I am committed. It will be exciting to see my sister at the Run, and my husband agrees it would be a great time to have a family vacation, too.  I just have to take baby steps.  First I will use, Couch to 5K 9 week I-Tunes podcast while on the treadmill, then I will follow my sisters advice.  So by January 2010 I should be running 3 miles everyother day. 

My eating only when hungry lifestyle is going well and I am ready for the next step.  Hopefully, the first pair of shoes will be running shoes.  I made it to my first earmark for success and now I am holding off until the next earmark, which is 5 lbs away.  The shoes I want are expensive for my budget right now.  I can wait!

Day 96....Thanksgiving and Weigh In!

Well, I lost .4 lbs, it's not a lot but it is a loss!  Thanksgiving meal was very simple and delicous!

Day 95.....I Am Up!

I woke up early today, with a desire to excercise!  I am not only shocked, but excited!

Day 93.....All Things Will Fade Away

Lots of decisions have been made that will drastically change life for me and my family.  We are putting our house on the market and preparing to start a new life in a new town.  I am such a planner that all this change has my mind working overtime.  I toss and turn at night, praying that my mind will stop.  Despite all the crazy, I am not biting my nails or grabbing bags of chips to consume, which is probably what the old me would've done.   I realize that no matter what happens, God is my stready, trusted friend that will never leave me or forsake me.  My will may not be His will, but I can trust Him with what is best for me.  I am relying on that trust as I focus on God and not my current circumstances.  I have not been doing my food journal, but listening to my hunger signals.  I will start journalling again when my mind can get back to it.  I have decised that I will not let excercise or journalling be my success factor, but the scale and depending solely on the signals my body is giving me.  I am reminded in scripture that all things (material) will pass away, but God will last forever and He only cares about How I manage myself into His purpose and for His glory.

1 Corinthians 9:24-26 (New Living Translation)

24 Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! 25 All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. 26 So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing.

Day 89..... Weigh In Week 13

I lost 2.8 lbs!  I love this new worry free approach.  God is Awesome!

Day 87......Convicted, Confirmed, Crown of Beauty!

So the Holy Spirit was been subtly letting me know that this weight loss journey is a personal journey between He and I, not that I have to stop blogging, but that I need to look to Him for the right path to take. Let me go back about two weeks. I was getting discouraged about the scale and feeling like I needed to start following a strict diet and exercise routine. I was actually getting anxious about it. I was anxious enough that I was looking for diet programs, and exercise routines that I could stick to. Every time I looked at a scheduled program, I got a quickening in my spirit, like an internal caution. Weird feeling! Then I began praying, "Lord, what?" "I am trying to do what You want me to do?" I waited a couple days, keeping on with my normal discipline of keeping my food journal, but I was not exercising. I began to seek the Holy Spirit in quite prayer, the same whisper again, "Look to me". I was frustrated, feeling like I didn't know what that meant or how to do that. I was looking for a proven method, a scheduled program of exactly what to do. Four days ago, my mom brought over a bible based, "Give it to God" approach to weight loss in a series with a workbook, tapes, video and a carry along booklet of scripture proclamations. I have been reading the material and watching the tapes for the last couple of days. I was practically in tears; everything that the Holy Spirit has shown me this far in my journey was the same as what this resource was implementing in a HOW TO format. Yes, it sounds crazy. Here is the basics, read the bible, listen to your body's true hunger signals, then eat slow and thankfully until full, if you still feel like grazing or if your thoughts are continually on food, then focus on the Word to redirect your thinking to the One who can take that desire away. I have tried this approach for a few days, it is difficult at times, and I have had to talk myself into redirecting my thoughts, but it has helped. I have been journaling my food for 4 days since I started this and I have noticed that I am able to stay within my allotted points without too much effort. I haven't weighed in, to see how the weight is doing, but I feel really good. I am at a complete loss for the words to describe how amazed I am that the Holy Spirit was trying to steer me in this direction all along. Oh, the best confirmation, I have always loved the Isaiah 61:3, the great exchange of beauty for ashes. The Lord is now showing me HOW TO exchange my ashes for His beauty. I am in Awe.

Isaiah 61:3

.... and provide for those who grieve in Zion—

to bestow on them a crown of beauty

instead of ashes,

the oil of joy

instead of mourning,

and a garment of praise

instead of a spirit of despair.

They will be called mighty oaks,

a planting of the LORD

for the display of his splendor

Day 84......In Prayer Closet

I am feeling very convicted in some of my weight loss/healthy approaches and I am in serious prayer over this.  The stange thing is my mom did not know what I was feeling convicted about. Today she felt led to bring me a  resource regarding weight.  I am totally blown away because the very things that I was being convicted about, this bible based weight loss resource addressed.  I want to research it a bit more before I totally switch my approach.  I am still keeping my daily food journal; however I have not posted for a few days, again it's because of a conviction in my spirit.  I know this sounds crazy!  I know the voice of the Holy Spirit and I can't afford to ignore what He is convicting me of EVEN IF IT DOES SOUND CRAZY!

1 Corinthians 1:25 (New Living Translation)

25 This foolish plan of God is wiser than the wisest of human plans, and God’s weakness is stronger than the greatest of human strength.

Day 83....Week 12

I weighed in on thursday and lost 1.8 lbs! Yeah!  However; I am having a off week not excercising, so I am getting into my prayer closet. I want to get back on my schedule that I worked so hard to establish.  "Lord help me!"

Day 79.....Less Talk, More Action

Daily Food Journal
(page taken from Weight Watchers journal)

Day 78......Posting

A wonderful day!  It feels so good to be in the palm of Gods hand!

Day 76......Cranberry Bread

My hubby fired up the bread maker the other night and made some cranberry bread.  He loves making bread.  Isn't that great?  I hope he likes making it enough to keep the pantry full!

Day 75.....Once Upon a Time and Now

My weight has always been a sore subject for me. Being teased and moving often didn’t help my self esteem. I was brought up in the church and Christian school, so I knew God. My relationship with God didn’t start until I really needed Him, the summer before my junior year of high school. That is when He became my comfort and Solace as I faced another year at a new school which always meant possible rejection. My young mind contributed this rejection to my weight. So that summer, was a time of exercise, writing all my hopes and dreams in my journal and spending time with my new buddy, God. As the year began, the world that I desperately wanted to fit into started to accept me. I gained friends and finally felt at home with myself, where I lived, and with my plans for my future. I felt I belonged, and I had it all under control. My old buddy, God, faded into the background. Then the worst possible thing was now my reality my family was moving again at the end of that year, my senior year. In my devastation I chose to blame God. I believed the lie that He had taken away all my hopes and dreams. I began a 7 year spiraling web, centered on self image, and anger. I believed that if I was going to amount to anything and if anyone was ever going to accept me I needed to be like the world. The world in my young mind looked like a desperate need to be skinny, getting attention of boys and unfortunately drinking alcohol. All my childhood fears, all the moving, the friendships I gained and lost, the broken ambition, rejection, the teasing flooded me. I lost hope. I was acting upon and listening to lies that motivated me down the wrong path. I began an "only eat an apple", or a binge then purge, type diet and noticed that when I look good I got attention. It didn't matter that it was the wrong kind of attention, it fed the lies that I chose to believe. Alcohol also fed the lie that I was only funny and socially accepted when I drank. My choices caused more heartaches, fear, pain, torment, and misery. I was a mess in that year before and just after I graduated high school. When things got really dismal, I always felt a protection over me a small comforting Voice in those times. I sought after my career choice, which was totally a wrong fit for me, a flight attendant that became afraid to fly. I found myself needing to eat but not knowing what to or how to eat to maintain my socially acceptable image. I got pregnant, got married, then my worst nightmare, I miscarried my baby. I found myself totally lost, confused, married and gaining weight fast. I was now in a job that met the needs of my new life, totally duty bound. This was a time and reason to get a feel good fix from my old Buddy, God, who incidentally, I still blamed for my bad behavior. I still felt protected. My heart softened enough to listen to the small Voice that actually kept me from slipping too far. Like times when I was tempted to violate my marriage vows but I obeyed that small Voice. I drifted into unfamiliar territory, accountability, when I joined Weight Watchers. I finally learned how and what to eat, I lost 30 pounds, but it was never enough. My brain kept seeing unattainable goals for my weight; I let other bodies dictate my success. I felt like I could never compete, never be good enough. I got depressed. Then wanted to have a baby to fill the void, but couldn't get pregnant. I enrolled in college to fill time, and chase another career for fulfillment. Nothing worked. I still got my God fix when I needed a boost and my husband got on the God fix, too. He also needed to get out of the depressed place we both were in. It’s amazing that God still comforted me even when I had such anger and resentment toward Him. I re-examined God and my past. In searching for something, I felt lead to a women’s conference at a local church and I found the “answer", the “answer" that I never knew. The "answer" was God requires something from me.....MY LIFE. I needed to see my life through the eyes of the One who created me, the One who holds my hopes and dreams in a safe place, until I ask Him for them. The one who knows exactly what will make me joyful, peaceful, kind, loving and hopeful, because He made me, He designed me. Like the engineer of a machine knows the intricate parts that make the machine do what it was designed for. I needed to give God my life and my trust. I asked God to forgive me and committed my life to Him, this time I said the prayer of salvation with a true heart felt motive and sincerity. God loved me too much to leave me with wounds that needed to heal, and a heart that was in pieces. That was 9 years ago; I am still being overhauled into the life He desires for me. I am only obligated to listen to His voice daily and walk in His guidance. God has revealed Himself to me through the Bible, through a church that I am a member of and serve at, through friends that God brought into my life, through finally listening to the parents that prayed me through my dark days, through alternative outreaches, through my now saved and living like a Godly man, husband. Now, I am crossing the bridge of obedience that’s called getting healthy. Whatever God has next for me requires health, requires healing the wound of poor self image, accepting the body He made, and the foods that He gave us to enjoy. I am excited to get to that place, but I am also learning to love the journey. It requires faith, hope, and most importantly love. God was with me the whole time, His protection was always their, His still small voice kept me safe. I won't be foolish again to blame my loving, redeeming, perfect Father for anything. I will, I choose and I know better. I still go through battles with the liar who wants to rob me of my best life; however God is still with me in the battle and He will always be the VICTOR! God has given me two beautiful daughters. I have come a long way. I can only look to and trust in the only ONE TRUE GOD, through JESUS, HIS SON and HIS SPIRIT my constant HELPER.

Day 74......Weight In Week 11

Yeah !  Finally a break through, I lost 3.8 lbs.  Now I need to stay on this track.

Day 73......The Path is Pure

I have kept a open mind. Waited for guidance, proceeded ahead with a plan of my own and then the Holy Spirit enlightened me. The next pursuit is pure, whole foods. I take that to mean no processed food, or food labels that have unrecognizable ingredients. When I say the Holy Spirit enlightened me, let me explain, I was at the local grocery store still not really knowing what "healthy eating" looked like for me, I didn't know what to buy. I bought I Can't Believe It's Not Butter spray, because when I was going to Weight Watchers meetings the spray was highly recommended and I successfully lost weight when I used it back in 2001. I didn't think too much about spray butter vs butter that night, However; in the morning while preparing breakfast I used the spray butter on my toast, ate my toast then thought out of the blue, "if it's not butter then what is it?" I actually got anxious about "what is it?". Then this unraveling happened, I want to eat healthy. I want to know what I am eating, I need to be accountable for what goes into my mouth as well as my little ones mouths. I battled over using real butter thinking that is pure fat, that can't be better for me. Can it? I googled healthy butter substitutes and found this article, http://yourtotalhealth.ivillage.com/butter-substitute.html, that was all I needed to know, it was confirmed. My new path is pure, whole foods, no compromise. Easily said, now can I do it! I looked in my pantry and I have several foods that I enjoy that contain more than one unrecognizable ingredient. Fiber One plus Antioxidents bar is one that I ate this morning. I need to be refined on this path, and I know the Holy Spirit will prick my conscience when I am way off. This morning, I dumped out my coffee, the coffee my husband made me, the coffee he makes for me every morning, my regular coffee with one splenda. I drank it and it tasted fake. I am in shock, because I loved the taste of splenda. I am drinking tea right now with no sweetner, that is not me, that is a power beyond reason. I hope all my temptations turn off like that. I am excited to see this path for whole, pure foods unfold. I am keeping a open mind. Waiting for any more interventions, by the way, Light Mayonaise has unrecognizable ingredients, but real Hellmans is pure.

Day 73....Confidence at the Crossroad

I am just a stay at home mom who wants to be in Gods will.  This journey I am on is at a crossroad,  I don't know the path to take or how hard the terrain will be. However; what I am is CONFIDENT. CONFIDENT that the Holy Spirit is NOT going to lead me astray. He will lead me to the desire of my heart.  I am CONFIDENT, because I know getting healthy is what God wants for me.  The path that I take, the hard terrain that I crawl over is my personal journey and I will stay focused on my guide, the Holy Spirit.  I am at a crossroad.  As I make changes,  I am going to be open to what crosses my path ie. new blog sites that peak my interest, info from friends that confirms what is right for me.  I will look for the complete and perfect lifestyle that the Holy Spirit knows will work for me.

1 Corinthians 13:9-10 (Amplified Bible)

9 For our knowledge is fragmentary (incomplete and imperfect), and our prophecy (our teaching) is fragmentary (incomplete and imperfect).

10 But when the complete and perfect (total) comes, the incomplete and imperfect will vanish away (become antiquated, void, and superseded).

Day 72.....Unscathed

Halloween came and went.  I made it out unscathed; but maybe a bit scroogie.  I had a getaway girlie night for myself containing a massage and girlie conversation.  Meanwhile, my girls got loaded up on candy with their daddy.  Until I can be disciplined to not let bad foods take charge over my brain (craving) then bad food should be out of sight and thus out of mind. Someday when this disipline is developed I will be able to have just one.  Later that night, my hubby hid the loot but set out a tootsie roll and a three muskateer mini for me.  He is so sweet.  Grrr. (See Nov. 1 post)

Day 71.......Healthy is Awesome

Getting healthy should not be a burden, I need to change my perspective to "being healthy is a awesome thing that I can choose to do for myself".  It means more energy, better quality of life, a good example to my girls, most importantly being healthy is the outside reflection of my inside, if I am healthy on the inside (spiritually) then that  health should spill over to my outside (physical) body. 

Day 70.....Cool Blogs

I was surfing the blog world for some encouragement and found two blogs that are thriving. Why, because they lost their weight and are maintaining it well.  I am definately going to follow these blogs to get some good ideas, http://ronisweigh.com/ and http://www.eatliverun.com/.  I did notice on both sites that the girls take health to a soy, raw veggie level that I am not sure I am ready for, but maybe I could take it slowly.   I know I could do it, if I just allowed myself to want to.  A friend of mine just converted from whole milk to skim, which was a huge thing for her. I reviewed my food journal and noticed that my idea of healthy was pure foods, like pure butter, pure maple syrup.  I was headed for pure sugar to replace my splenda, but I think I may need to reevaluate this approach!  Long sigh....... I may need to change my blog title to skip the cookie eat the flax....Oh dear! 

Day 69..... Still Goin'

I got up early, got on the treadmill for 30 min., did pilates.  I am still goin', doin' my thang.  I read over my helpful scriptures, to remind myself how far I have come mentally and spiritually.  I feel so much better now than I did 2 months ago, so I am movin' on.  I am definately not going to let the devil rob me of how far I have come, he may have gotten me frustrated for the night, but this morning I woke up victoriously. 

Day 68.....Weigh In

"Successful people are nothing more than failures who kept getting up! If u've failed, get up and keep going! If u haven’t failed, u will."  This was todays facebook status from my ole youth group pastor, who now has a big church of his own in Alabama, The Rock.  I needed this quote today, because I feel like a failure.  I gained .8 lbs. !  I will still press on, even though I may need some outside intervention to get me on a successful path?!

Day 67......Deceived

It is a horrible feeling to be decieved.  When Eve ate the apple in the Garden of Eden, I am sure it was not worth it, and she must have felt so foolish to have believed a snake.  I am realizing that Satan uses deception all the time and he probably gets a big kick watching us fall for his lies.  I am determined to turn my ears off to him.  Last night I ate a great meal, we went out for chinese I ordered healthy dishes, egg drop soup, vegtables.  When I got home, I actually believed that I was still hungry and that I needed to eat the leftovers.  Why?  Why does my flesh want me to do something that is not good for me.  Why do I want to and fall for it?  I did eat the leftovers.  This morning I feel like I ate too much salt, I am puffy.  Feeling decieved.
I wish food deception was my only issue however; that is only a tidbit of what Satan does.  I am sick of it.    I am in the final book in the Left Behind series, Glorious Appearing. The book illistrates how many people are getting decieved, even through wanting noble things, and unfortunely will lose their eternal life and all the great things that Jesus died for us to have.  I get excited when someone goes to Panara Bread ahead of me and finds a table and highchair. That to me is going before and preparing a way.  I can't even fathom, what Jesus is up to,"Preparing a place for me"! How Awesome is that.  Do people want to know they are being robbed of that, or do they REALLY want to have this lifes unsatifactory goods?   Our only defense is to know who we are in Christ, what we NEED and get our satisfaction in knowing we listen only to truth, biblical truth. Is this human body/mind capable? Is my human body/mind capable?

John 14:2-3 (New International Version)

2  In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.

Day 66.....Priorities Straight

"Your words were found, and I ate them, and Your word was to me the joy and rejoicing of my heart; for I am called by Your name…."

Jeremiah 15:16, NKJV

I have not worked out on the treadmill since last week.  Last night I did pilates, but I skipped all the hard stuff.  I am getting away from my routine and feeling the effects.  My body wants to exercise, I feel better when I do.  Instead of getting down on myself, I am glad that even if I let my body down, my priority is still toward God.  I can not go a day or week without Him, His words, His comfort and ultimately its His strength that I count on to get me back on my routine.  There is a old Hymn "It is well with my soul", I know if my routine goes, or whatever caos may come if it is well with my soul, then my priorities are straight. 

Thank you for the confirmation, Beth Jones "Eat well and live " E-Devo

http://community.icontact.com/p/valleyfamilychurch/newsletters/bethjones/posts/eat-well-and-live

Day 65........God is in Control

Today I am refreshing myself with all the scriptures that have helped me get this far.

Father, I gave this ____ to You; I've maintained it to the best of my ability, but I don't own it. It belongs to You, so do with it whatever You would like. (Crown Financial Ministries http://www.crown.org/)

Proverbs 18:21

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life]

Jeremiah 29: 11

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Corinthians 6:12 (Amplified Bible)

12Everything is permissible (allowable and lawful) for me; but not all things are helpful (good for me to do, expedient and profitable when considered with other things). Everything is lawful for me, but I will not become the slave of anything or be brought under its power.

Philippians 4:13 (Amplified Bible)

13I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who [a]infuses inner strength into me; I am [b]self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency].

1 Kings 19:11-13 (New International Version)

11 The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

Psalm 94:19 (Amplified Bible)

19 In the multitude of my [anxious] thoughts within me, Your comforts cheer and delight my soul!

Galatians 5:5 (Amplified Bible)

5 For we, [not relying on the Law but] through the [Holy] Spirit's [help], by faith anticipate and wait for the blessing and good for which our righteousness and right standing with God [our [a]conformity to His will in purpose, thought, and action, causes us] to hope.

John 10:10 (Amplified Bible)

10 The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it [a]overflows).

Luke 5:3-4 (New International Version)

3 He got into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, and asked him to put out a little from shore. Then he sat down and taught the people from the boat.

4 When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, "Put out into deep water, and let down[a] the nets for a catch.

Romans 8:28 (Amplified Bible)

28 We are assured and know that [[a]God being a partner in their labor] all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose

Psalm 16:11

11 You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.

Nehemiah 8:10

Then he said to them, “Go your way, eat the fat, drink the sweet, and send portions to those for whom nothing is prepared; for this day is holy to our Lord. Do not sorrow, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

Hebrews 12:1-2

The Race of Faith

1 Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Hebrew 12:4-11 (Message Bible)

4-11 In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don't feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children?

My dear child, don't shrug off God's discipline,

but don't be crushed by it either.

It's the child he loves that he disciplines;

the child he embraces, he also corrects.

God is educating you; that's why you must never drop out. He's treating you as dear children. This trouble you're in isn't punishment; it's training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God's training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God's holy best. At the time, discipline isn't much fun. It always feels like it's going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it's the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God.

Isaiah 26:3 (Amplified Bible)

3You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You.

Revelations 21:1-5 (Amplified Bible)

3Then I heard a mighty voice from the throne and I perceived its distinct words, saying, See! The abode of God is with men, and He will live (encamp, tent) among them; and they shall be His people, and God shall personally be with them and be their God. 4God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and death shall be no more, neither shall there be anguish (sorrow and mourning) nor grief nor pain any more, for the old conditions and the former order of things have passed away.

5And He Who is seated on the throne said, See! I make all things new. Also He said, Record this, for these sayings are faithful (accurate, incorruptible, and trustworthy) and true (genuine

Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NIV)

12 Though one may be overpowered,

two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

Awesome Journey thus far.

Day 64.......Oh Oh Olive Garden!

What a test of will power, Olive Garden breadsticks, alfredo, and pasta.  I did so good, I only had one serving of salad, 1/2 portion of shrimp asparagus risotto, and sipped on a cafe Latte while I conquered my battle of the will.  I felt great when I left and was satified.  Yes, I wanted to eat a ton of breadsticks lathered in alfredo sauce, and have a double portion of salad and finish my other half of risotto and lick the bowl, however; I maintained my sanity and said "no" to my naughty flesh! 

Day 63......It's Potty time

Well, I drank all the water!  I also had coffee and tea.  I need to get used to "potty time", because that seems to be the theme of the day.  I hope a see a noticable difference on the scale.  I did notice that I felt full all day, I did not think about eating.  That is huge, if water does that then it is worth it.

Day 62........Water

This week I am going to make sure I drink the Weight Watchers recommended 6/ 8oz glasses of water.  I have a water bottle with me that I need to fill twice a day.  I am curious to see if it makes a difference. 

Week 9 Overview and Weigh-In

Weigh-in was a success.  Another baby step, but a loss none the less.  I lost 1.6 lbs. just 2.2 more pounds and I will be at my first goal.  God is good!!!  People are starting to notice, which feels amazing.  This week went pretty smooth, staying on my points.  I have to say, I know it is because I have kept my focus and my attention on God.  Books, music and videos have all been positive and encouraging to keep me on track.  Little prayers of help, when I go the refridgerator or when my girls left over chicken strips start looking good, or when my hubby brings home ice cream, have helped me incredibly! Yahoo, on to week ten, and only 42 more weeks to go.

Day 61........Friends in Faith

Going at things alone is not God's best.  He gave us fellow brother/sister christains that we need to hook arms with to tackle the journey together.  Aligning our spirits with like minded people who believe in our same Hope is the key to success.  The bible talks about this

Ecclesiastes 4:12 (NIV)

12 Though one may be overpowered,

two can defend themselves.

A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

My strength is easily overpowered, but if I know I have a friend praying and believing in me then my faith is intensified. Where there is Faith there is Strength.   Together we can claim what God says is ours, victory over our enemy.  Tap into a strong cord, that is not easily broken, a friend in faith.

Day 60.......Getting Into It

 I really enjoyed the treadmill last night.  I did a 45 minute workout (3.5 mph).  I felt great.  It is a great feeling when your mind, and body start getting into it.  The workout is a part of my routine that my body and mind look forward to. 

Day 59.........When stuff gets Tough Pray for Peace

Sometimes just getting through a day of your stuff is tough.  I need to take breathers every few minutes and say, " this too will pass", then I have to pray,"God, give me the grace to get through this moment".  Now, the old me would've grabbed something from the refrigerator and decompressed with something, usually unhealthy, to eat.  The new me, says," Thank you Jesus for peace that you say is mine for the taking." With His peace I can decompress without food, or anxiety."   For instance, I just had a hectic morning of get up, everyone dressed, no milk for cereal no time for cooking, brush teeth, brush hair,"where's shoe", find shoe, socks on, shoes on, coats on, grab bags, in the car, McD's, drop off preschooler, Library parking a block away, out of car, in stroller, walk, pick up books, check out books, walk to car, find keys, stroller in car, toddler in car, look for phone, forgot phone, go home, pick up phone, call GG, pick up GG, get to flu clinic,wait in line at flu clinic, GG shot, my shot, toddler straddle me, GG distact toddler while gettting shot, toddler scream, get balloon, pick up preschooler, drop off GG, "Thank you GG", lunch in town, park at grocery store, get daughter 1 out, go to get daughter 2 out and she has spilled her drink in her carseat, I have no change of clothes and she is too wet to hide it. I take a deep breath, pray for peace, breathe out, thank him for His peace and I felt the Holy Spirit say, "shopping can wait, go home and rest", that gave me the peace and patience I needed to load my girls back into the car and head home.  Now I am sipping a cup of tea, I have a daugher napping and I am in perfect peace.  The rest of my day is redefined and actually will work out a lot smoother.  AHHHHH!!!! Peace is Awesome.

Day 58........Hosanna to the Highest

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M7SMUf6QcyQ
Revelations 21:1-5 (Amplified Bible)

3Then I heard a mighty voice from the throne and I perceived its distinct words, saying, See! The abode of God is with men, and He will live (encamp, tent) among them; and they shall be His people, and God shall personally be with them and be their God. 4God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and death shall be no more, neither shall there be anguish (sorrow and mourning) nor grief nor pain any more, for the old conditions and the former order of things have passed away.

5And He Who is seated on the throne said, See! I make all things new. Also He said, Record this, for these sayings are faithful (accurate, incorruptible, and trustworthy) and true (genuine).

I believe in His son Jesus and I know where I am going when all things pass away and become new.  I will reside with God and He will reside with me.  Awesome!  As great as my life is now on earth, the greatest parts are only a taste of what God has planned for my eternity. Until then I will obey and be disciplined with my focus on the God that is faithful and true and that has my eternity prepared and waiting.

Day 57.........Fit Feels Good

Today, My clothes fit great, not snug at all.  I am excited about the little steps of progess.  Thank you Jesus for Your help.

Isaiah 26:3 (Amplified Bible)

3You will guard him and keep him in perfect and constant peace whose mind [both its inclination and its character] is stayed on You, because he commits himself to You, leans on You, and hopes confidently in You.

Day 56.....A Little Goes a Long Way

Little goals, are the best!  When you take baby steps it doesn't seem like your going very far, very fast but when you look back you are making progress, which is a whole lot better than standing still.  I am encouraged today. 

Day 55......Don't Eat Nuts

Upon review of my food journal, I have been miscalculating the pistachios that I have been consuming.  I measured more accurately the amount I was eating and it was more like 2 to 3 oz. which doubles/ triples the points.  I am surprised I didn't gain weight.  Oh well.  I know better now.  I sent all the nuts to work with my fit and trim hubby.

Weigh-In Week 8

I lost Weight....Yahoo!  The only thing is it wasn't a lot of weight in fact it is a portion of a pound that is hardly even mentionable.  I am so glad I have a decimal scale! I lost .2 lbs!  I will be happy with it!

Day 54 & Week 8 Overview......Do this, Do that, but Don't do that, UGH!

Everday push push push, don't eat too much of anything, moderation is key.  It all sounds like a guidebook to success that I am following.  I still wake up and see the old me.  I am looking forward to seeing a new me, without all the do this, do that rolling in my head.  Discipline is hard!

Day 53.......Sore Core

I did Pilates yesterday!  The small, graceful movements are proving their impactful, I am sore in my core muscles.  Which is exactly what I need to strengthen, my core.  A pregnant belly easily losses its muscle structure. My structure is gone, but its a great feeling to know the muscles still work.  A interesting parallel is, the fruits of the spirit show how strong our spirit core is.  A healthy spiritual core will show the evidence of love, joy, peace, patients, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.  Just like looking at my week tummy is evidence of a week core.  Some people can have Jesus in their heart, but choose not to excercise their fruits of the spirit.  It's sad. Our circumstances seem to test our spiritual cores strength and sometimes we go through things that rob us of all our fruits.  The good news is we can excercise our spiritual muscles, for example, apologizing when we don't want to. Not apologizing is week, but excercising peace,by saying we are sorry yeilds peace in your home or relationship, which is an awesome feeling.  I have a sore core, but look forward to that awesome tight, slim, trim tummy that this sore muscle will yeild.

Day 52.......Battle is Raging

The battle vs flesh and spirit is raging.  Joyce Meyer recently preached, "if you want to kill your flesh don't feed it what it wants anymore and it will die".  I am in that battle.  I refuse to feed my flesh what it wants and I feel like a recovering addict, talking to myself, growling at myself, even getting mad at myself (self being my flesh).  In those crazy times, I go to God for strength in prayer and read my help scriptures.  I got on the treadmill last night and pushed myself for 45 minutes.  I felt great afterwards.  I need to get motivated again, I realize that forming a habit may take 21 days, but keeping it habit means no breaks.   I want to get that feeling of necessity back, I lost it for awhile. This morning I am going to start a Pilates program on DVD with Denise Austin.  I lost weight thanks to Denises'  TV programs back in high school. She is always a refreshing, familiar face to see.

Day 51......Strength of Trust

http://www.leftbehind.com/01_products/details.asp?isbn=978-0-8423-3236-1.

I have been so exhausted lately, laying down whenever possible.  God knew and was in the book that I've been reading  Armageddon, from the Left Behind Series by Tim LaHaye and Jerry Jenkins.   Chloe, a main character in the storyline, is facing the enemies death sentence. While in her cell, the night before she is to die, thinking about her husband, her son, her father, and friends she became very anxious and longed to be with her people again.  In this time of saddness an angel appeared to her to comfort her.  He told her tomorrow she would be with Jesus.  As soon as Chloe focused on Jesus, her fears, her anxiety, and the longing for her family switched to a trust and hope on Jesus.  She knew heaven was the ultimate and she trusted Jesus to be with her family, even while they grieved her loss.  That strength of trust is what I desire, the unfailing trust that reassures me that Christ knows best for me and mine.

Day 50...& When Your Only 1/2 Way Done Your Neither Done or Done.

It's pretty bad when you don't know if your coming or going somedays.  I have been exhausted, wanting to sneak in a nap whenever possible. I missed the treadmill workout yesterday, but I did stay within my food points for the day.  I definately feel a war going on emotionally.  My negative side is telling me this is too much work and I am not making good progress. While my positive side reminds me that I am cooking at home almost completely and I don't buy processed food except for cereal.  The centered and focused me is giving it all to God and praying, "Help me stay focused on Your opinion of me".

Hebrew 12:4-11 (Message Bible)

4-11  In this all-out match against sin, others have suffered far worse than you, to say nothing of what Jesus went through—all that bloodshed! So don't feel sorry for yourselves. Or have you forgotten how good parents treat children, and that God regards you as his children?

My dear child, don't shrug off God's discipline,

but don't be crushed by it either.

It's the child he loves that he disciplines;

the child he embraces, he also corrects.

God is educating you; that's why you must never drop out. He's treating you as dear children. This trouble you're in isn't punishment; it's training, the normal experience of children. Only irresponsible parents leave children to fend for themselves. Would you prefer an irresponsible God? We respect our own parents for training and not spoiling us, so why not embrace God's training so we can truly live? While we were children, our parents did what seemed best to them. But God is doing what is best for us, training us to live God's holy best. At the time, discipline isn't much fun. It always feels like it's going against the grain. Later, of course, it pays off handsomely, for it's the well-trained who find themselves mature in their relationship with God.

Thank you God for your words of encouragement, when I am feeling the pain of the discipline, You remind me it is for my good because I am Your child that You care for enough to discipline. 

Day 49......When your Done, Your Done

I am focusing on my eating this week, making sure that I don't overeat.  I want to follow my Weight Watcher points system and be done when the points are gone for the day.  I need to add lots of salads and vegtables to my daily menu. Carrots and simple salads like a spinach, romaine lettuce mix with tomato and italian dressing seem to be the easiest and most enjoyable with little points consumed. I am meditating on my helpful scriptures for encouragment and strength and praying that I will lose weight in week 8.

Day 48.......New Perspective

I am reading a book by Elizabeth George, A Woman's Walk with God, Growing in the fruit of the Spirit. The first two chapters offer me a new perspective on living in the Spirit, in that it will automatically yield abiding in and fulfilling Gods laws and statues. Sometimes I mistakenly try to live by the law and think," ok, follow those rules", however if I don't read my bible daily and pray, the Holy Spirit won't be able to direct me in how to follow His laws.
For instance, this new perspective affects the discipline of getting healthy. If I, in obedience to God's law of taking care of my body, lock my thinking on ME, my body, my health, my weight, my this, or my that, I could easily fall into making my discipline a higher priority than God, which is idolatry. By trying to follow a law without the Holy Spirit I could easily break another law, which creates confusion and frustration, which is not Gods plan.  In contrast if I recognize that God is disciplining me to get healthy, then my trust, my hope, my desire go only to Him for His help and His voice in the process. Whats great is that the Holy Spirit is gentle, encouraging and won't frustrate or confuse me, it's even okay to fail, He forgives and gives me the strength to start fresh.
I know this may seem like a silly concept when it's applied to weight loss, but it is a biblical principle that applies to anything we are called to do. If God is saying,

Ephesians 5:22

22  Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord.

which is a very hard commandment, and if you try it without the Holy Spirit it will not work out the way God intended, but if you yield to the Holy Spirit (who, by the way, knows your perticular situation with your husband), He will walk you through the perfect way to fulfill this commandment. It will be difficult, you may fail, but God is merciful and gracious to us. He wants us to continually walk through the process with Him.


What is important is that if you hear the Holy Spirit, test His voice it will NEVER point you in a direction that is not a commandment in the bible. The Holy Spirits job is to help us fulfill the commandments, laws, statutes, not to do the opposite, if you hear something that goes against Gods word, it is not the Holy Spirit. Pray and get confirmation in the Bible always. I say this because it breaks my heart to hear prisoners that murdered, kidnapped, molested, stole, ect. say that God told them to do it. What? The voice in their head obviously was not God, the Holy Spirit or Jesus. Who else is there, the Devil. He is the great deceiver. Please, don't get deceived.

Week 7 Weigh In

Not as bad as I thought.  I was preparing for the worst and hoping for the best.  I did gain, but only .8 lbs  that is exactly what I gained last week.  I am hoping for a better weigh in on week 8.

Day 47 & Week 7 Overview.....Bumps in the Road

I had a wonderful week of vacation with my family and extended family.  We traveled up north saw the fall colors and thoughly enjoyed eachothers company, the sites, the food, the wine, meeting relatives for the first time and hearing the past relived through the memories of a 82 and 89 year old, and was entertained by my 4 year and 18 month old daughters as they saw and did new things.  Wow!  A week full of relational bonding.  I broke my dicipline this past week and I was feeling bad, I did not want to blog. I did not journal. I could've easily given up my 365 day challange.  I needed encouragement, because I knew God wanted "me" to get healthy and break a bondage I have over-endulging in food.   God encouraged me in two ways.  1) Celebrate!  God is my Joy!

Nehemiah 8:10

Then he said to them, “Go your way, eat the fat, drink the sweet, and send portions to those for whom nothing is prepared; for this day is holy to our Lord. Do not sorrow, for the joy of the LORD is your strength.”

 

2)Run the race, don't stop when you have a bump in the road.

Hebrews 12:1-2

The Race of Faith

1 Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Even though my disipline was put on hold, God encouraged me to pick back up and keep on in the faith that God is my joy in the running.  I am at peace today, I am up early and ready to journal my foods and take on week 8. I will weigh in and post my weight later today. 

Day 46......Not Defeated!

The best part about my walk with God is He loves me no matter what, He knows I will make mistakes, He knows I will disappoint, He knows I am not perfect. He knows and because of that He is my Joy.  I Know that if I am doing my best even in totally failure, He loves me and wants me to just trust in Him and rejoice in all things.  Today marks the end of my vacation and by all accounts it was also a vacation of my "healthy" discipline.  But I will look at the scale tomorrow with a Not Defeated attitude and pick up where I left off.  It's not the destination but the journey that counts, I had a fall, but I am back up again.  The devil can't keep me down.  I have my eyes fixed on a hope!

Psalm 16:11

11  You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.

Day 45.......Warning!

I am not back on track....AHHHHH!  I am fumbling for words today.  I can only assume that this discipline of healthy moderate eating is not established in me, yet.  I also have not excercised on the treadmill in 4 days.  I have not been doing my daily bible study or quoting my "help" scriptures.  When left to my own demise with food I reach for more, droll over, and snitch.  Not good.  I need some encouragment to get back to center!  I thought it would be easy to get back on track after temporary bliss.  My dear sister is visiting and we went out for coffee at my favorite coffee house and I enjoyed my favorite coffee with 1/2 a coconut cream cupcake with thick lemon buttercream frosting. Later at the theater I, of course, had popcorn. I am so bad. On the flip side I am enjoying the remaining time of family vacationing with us and have relationally been recharged. It is such a natural thing to sit, talk and Eat!

Day 44.......Back on Track

It is easy to get off track when the surroundings are unfamiliar.  On my trip up north I preplanned my meals as much as possible and did not get enticed to eat out.  The hard to resist moments came when the rain came and comfort foods were not only comforting but warm and delicious, Chili and warm fresh bread.  Wow! Is it even possible to resist?  Grand Traverse Select, Reisling, I really enjoyed in the evening snuggled up to the fireplace.  Ghirardelli chocolate with a roasted marshmellow on a graham cracker, Yummy.  This was my daughters first marshmellow roasting experience over a open fire pit on a crisp fall evening.  Long walks and great memories with family.  This is all the stuff God wants us to enjoy and relish in.  I did not think about my weight once, but I made healthy food choices and enjoyed them to the fullest.   Joyce Meyer talks about a principle in her book, Eat the Cookie Buy the Shoes.  The principle is to disipline yourself daily, but allow yourself the "atta girl/boy" moments that the hard work of disipline requires by enjoying the moment and endulging.  I did just that fully enjoyed and endulged, but today I am back on track.

Day 41-43......LAX and Total Relax

I had the most relaxing, enjoyable time.  The only thing I am thinking now is "OH MY" I hope I did not gain weight.  Fresh baked bread and good food, like fresh salmon and Chili is almost impossible to resist seconds.  I must say the only bad thing I ate was Chocolate....Smores that is...I had to.  I don't regret it at all.  I just know that my mini spluge is over and it is back to moderation tomorrow.  Don't look for a food journal entry because I did not journal my intake at all.

Day 39 & Week 6 Overview.......AWAY,YEA!

I am going away for a long weekend with my hubby and extended family.  I am so excited for a get away, but I need to get the "lax" out of relax. I am making such good progress; however I can not stop here.  I have only skimmed the surface of my goals and I need to stay focused on the big hope and not let food boss me around.  I weighed in today.....I gained .8lbs (almost 1 pound). YIKES!

Day 38........God is SOOOO Good

How can God do mysterious and unexpected things when we freak out when the mysterious and unexpected happen.  Last week I was completely caught off guard by a crazy situation that came up, it left me in a "what just happened" state of mind.  I chalked it up to the enemy trying to disrupt me, and prayed that God would bring understanding in His time.  Well, last night the strange and unusual turned into a major answer to prayer concerning my house, and my weathered old fence that I wanted to invest money into, but the extra funds were not available.  Would you believe a neighbor has volunteered to replace our old fence with a brand new vinyl fence, including the gate at no expense to us.  What is that, Who does that?  All I can say is God knew, and God provided!

Romans 8:28 (Amplified Bible)

28  We are assured and know that [[a]God being a partner in their labor] all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose.

Wow, do I ever need to chill out and let God be God, working it out for me.  All I need to do is stay focused on His will and obey, obey, obey!  Oh and how do I know that I am listening to and obeying God?!  1) I recognize His voice...He is in the stillness.  2) His words are ALWAYS confirmed and ALWAYS line up with at least 3 scriptures.  That is my test, if I ever doubt His voice.

Day 37.......Health Food for Dummies

Learning how to eat healthy is a slow process of getting rid of and changing the foods that I am used to eating/cooking.  One thing that I love is sweet and salty, I get cravings for salty foods pretty regularly.  I have a new healthy snack that I hope will take the place of potato chips.  It's sliced carrots steamed, drained, add sugar and salt to taste.  Easy, quick and I love 'em, so does my 18 month old.  We went through 3 cups of carrots today.  Go Veggies!

Day 36.....Wading in the Shallow End

I can imagine anyone that has read this blog could easily think, "How shallow is she, using scriptures for the shallow purpose of losing weight".  It is shallow, however I know God has a deeper purpose for me, but He has me wading in the shallow end until I am ready to go deep.  I believe God takes us in the critical state we are in and invests in us for His glory and for His purpose and I fully trust Him for that.  I was in a critical state, not even in the shallow end, I was on the beach watching life pass me by.  Now I am up in the water and wading it out.  I want to be the best me that God can use.  No more halfsies.  All of me.

Luke 5:3-4 (New International Version)

3  He got into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, and asked him to put out a little from shore. Then he sat down and taught the people from the boat.

4  When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, "Put out into deep water, and let down[a] the nets for a catch.

I am waiting for the day God says to me, "Put out into deep water....for a catch"

Day 35......First Reported Cancer Case

On day 27 I added this scripture,

 Exodus 15:26 (Amplified Bible)

6 Saying, If you will diligently hearken to the voice of the Lord your God and will do what is right in His sight, and will listen to and obey His commandments and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases upon you which I brought upon the Egyptians, for I am the Lord Who heals you.

The "I brought upon the Egyptians" part stuck in my mind.  I googled first reported cancer case and was amazed that cancer was first reported in Egypt.  I am not trying to say anything more than, I want to take this verse seriously and do what is right in His sight. Not just with keeping the body that He gave me healthy but in all things my actions, my words,ect.

  Lord, help me to diligently harken to Your voice and do what is right in Your sight, and listen to and obey Your commandments and keep all Your statutes, so that none of the diseases that were brought upon the Egyptians will come upon me, for You are the Lord Who heals.

Day 34........AAAHHHH Anxiety

It is so easy for me to get overwhelmed by the smallest thing.  Packing for a trip, AAAHHH.  Cleaning my house, AAHHHHH.  Pre-planning for grocery shopping, AAHHHH.  It sounds so funny even to admit it.  I get anxious about it all. Anxiety leads to nail biting, nail biting leads to snacking, snacking leads to overeating and then I will be anxious about that. 

Philippians 4:6 (Amplified Bible)

6  Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition ([a]definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God.

I am going to tell God all my anxious thoughts and see if He guides me.  I know it works because the other day I was about to bite my fingernails and I said a quick prayer, "God, I don't want to do this, help me" and I heard a whisper to paint my nails a dark color.  I did it, I bought the darkest color I would dare wear, dark cherry, and I've been wearing it for a week.  I am more aware of the unconcious times my nails go to my mouth, and I stop myself, knowing it will mess up the nail color if I bite my nail.  Funny, how silly it is to think God cares about my nails....but the verse says if it makes you anxious then God wants to know about it. 

Day 33.......Expect the Unexpected

I am going to freeze some PBJ sandwiches and make some trail mix.  I need to be ready with healthy alternatives when I am away from home.  If I keep some food ready to grab quick, I may be less tempted to go with the unhealthy alternative, fast food drive thrus....Yuk!  I am more aware of my food journal today.  I need to re-evaluate my food choices.  I am doing good with my weight loss, but healthy food choices need to be my first priority.  I need to pre-plan for the the unexpected.

Day 32 & Week 5 Overview......Good Wins

Wow!  A week of trusting and prayer.  I am still mystified by some craziness that has been happening.  I have resolved to laugh, and pray.  God says He has my best in mind, and He tells us that Satan will try to steal, kill and destroy what God intended for good. I know that Satan does not want me healthy or happy, so at his attempt to mess with my head, I laugh!  Good wins!
At weigh-in today, I lost another 2 lbs.  Yeah!  I am so excited!  That brings my total to 6.1 lbs in 5 weeks!

Jeremiah 29:11 (Amplified Bible)

11 For I know the thoughts and plans that I have for you, says the Lord, thoughts and plans for welfare and peace and not for evil, to give you hope in your final outcome.

John 10:10 (Amplified Bible)

10 The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it [a]overflows).

Day 31.........I feel great!

My body is changing.  My clothes fit better!  My husband noticed, which is the best feeling!

Day 31........Woopsi Daisy!

Oops I did it.....I let my guard down and gave in to hunger last night.  I did not feel good going to bed, and this morning woke up hungrier than normal!  I need to get back on track today.....I love fresh starts!

Never let your guard down.....focus on the hope!

Galatians 5:5 (Amplified Bible)

5 For we, [not relying on the Law but] through the [Holy] Spirit's [help], by faith anticipate and wait for the blessing and good for which our righteousness and right standing with God [our [a]conformity to His will in purpose, thought, and action, causes us] to hope.

Day 31.......New Comforts

I am learning new ways to find comfort. Getting reconnected with my husband has been a surprising comfort.  I listened to Focus on the Family this morning on the radio.  After the radio broadcast, I called my husband while he was driving to work, he said he was listening to the same thing!  It had to be a Holy Spirit thing. I highly recommend listening to the broadcast, which is the best marriage/intimacy insight that I have ever heard....very relatable.

Dr Julie Slatterly
http://listen.family.org/daily/A000002201.cfm

Day 30........Anxious

What does it mean when things weigh heavy on your mind?  When your gut senses somethings not quite right.  It's a overwhelming feeling, I am struggling with this.  I recognize that when I don't have the answers to things that I feel I need to....a sense of things being out of place. I want to bite my nails or eat for no reason. I know this sounds crazy!  I am working it out myself, but I've identified that this feeling makes me want to resort to my old comfort, eating.  I won't let it get me.....I am praying.

Psalm 94:19 (Amplified Bible)

19 In the multitude of my [anxious] thoughts within me, Your comforts cheer and delight my soul!

Daily Food Journal

Day 29......Comfort in the Schedule

One day of getting frustrated about not being on schedule, gave me a whole new appreciation for the days that run smoothly.  I have found comfort in having a plan, with little ones it is so much easier on everyone to anticipate when nap time, bath time, dinner time, and bed time is. If those happen smoothly then I can get my things done. My husband and I have made 8pm our time to de-stress, he plays the drums and I get on the treadmill.  We both look forward to it, and it's become a routine. 

Day 28.......Strange Things Happen to our Good Intentions

I had a very strange day, full of strange things that happened.  I needed to attend to situations that I was not prepared for.  I felt very sidetracked.  My plans for the evening changed which effected what was for dinner and my workout.  I have learned that God is in the flow.  I have to be able to readjust my schedule and get realigned when possible.  God cares about all the details and He is in the details.  He wants to see if I can leave things in His hands and not get shaken when things don't happen as planned or expected.  It is a hard thing to do, I get focused on what I need to do, and forget that I desire to live a Holy Spirit adventurous life, which means I have to be ready for anything not shaken, but steadfast in whatever comes my way. 
In my quiet time, my time to reallign myself, I discovered a scripture. I love getting confirmations. 

1 Kings 19:11-13 (New International Version)

11 The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave. Then a voice said to him, "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

The Lord is in the gentle whisper, when all the crazy caos is over. The test is to wait for it.....wait for His voice....don't get caught up in the crazy caos.

Day 27 & Month 1 Overview........Spiritual and Physical Training!

This month has been hard, a struggle, grabbing on to anything as inspiration to keep me on track. Now that I have come over a couple hurdles, I don't want to lose sight of "Why" I am really doing this.
Psalm 91:1-2......dwelling in the secret place (listening to the voice of the Lord, and obeying)

1 HE WHO [a]dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall remain stable and fixed under the shadow of the Almighty [Whose power no foe can withstand].

2 I will say of the Lord, He is my Refuge and my Fortress, my God; on Him I lean and rely, and in Him I [confidently] trust!

Amplified Bible Footnotes:

Psalm 91  The rich promises of this whole chapter are dependent upon one's meeting exactly the conditions of these first two verses (see Exod. 15:26).

Exodus 15:26 (Amplified Bible)

26 Saying, If you will diligently hearken to the voice of the Lord your God and will do what is right in His sight, and will listen to and obey His commandments and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases upon you which I brought upon the Egyptians, for I am the Lord Who heals you.

I don't know what God's will is for my future; however I have felt His whisper to lose the extra pounds and maintain a lifestyle of good health.  If that whisper is the Holy Spirit and I don't listen, then what?  I will not be dwelling in His secret place,  I may never know His stability and protection on my life.  I believe that God gives us what we can handle and if we pass the test we move forward in His will, if we are not able to obey the small things then we halt His will. 

This week I lost 3.5 lbs.  That is a total for the month of 4.1 lbs.  I am very thankful.  My jeans fit better and I feel great. 

1 Timothy 4:8 (Amplified Bible)

8 For physical training is of some value (useful for a little), but godliness (spiritual training) is useful and of value in everything and in every way, for it holds promise for the present life and also for the life which is to come.

Day 26.....Habit Forming

Working out is a habit!  My husband and I were discussing some vacation plans and I blurted out, "I hope there is a workout room in the hotel so I can exercise."  I said it as if it was a normal part of my daily routine, as if I was asking if the room had a sink so I could brush my teeth.  I am surprised.  I am not sure when it happened but I am glad that my new normal is losing it's newness.  I can celebrate that I am over the first "forming new habits" hurdle!  Yeah Hoo!  Now, Lord give me the strength to endure the rest!

Day 25.......Growlings

Last night I realized that my stomach growling doesn't have to mean I am hungry, it could mean I am making a change to my eating habits and my stomach is now fully aware and wondering if I am aware. Oh I am fully aware! What did I do...... I had a big glass of water and went to bed early!  This morning I am having a fiber bar.....letting my stomach know that waiting 8 hours to eat again is okay.  I can't be ruled by my old self, especially when the new me is making such great progress.  I think this would be called dying to the old man.....I was tempted and chose the way out....Rest!

Day 24......This Blogs for Me

Today at church the message was on 18 things to put on your bucket list.....two that stuck out 1) do something outside of your comfort zone  2) write or record something.  Funny how the littlest things God can confirm to let us know we are on the right track.  I love it!
Daily food journal

Day 23......Love and Health

I recently debated "is saying 'I Love you' enough".  My stand is no.....not if it's not backed by evidence.  This relates to my commitment to get healthy because it too requires evidence and not just blog entries (empty words) it requires dying to what was normal and start creating a new normal......this is not easy.....it is a struggle; however I am determined to succeed, this determination requires me to do what is out of my comfort zone.  I am breaking through my old comfort and focusing on where my hope lies, not on my present circumstances or emotions. 

Bottom line, I am going to add my food journal to my daily blogs.  True commitment is putting evidence to your words.  I am commited to this and if showing my food journal is going to keep me on track then that is what I am going to do. 

I know Love and Health is a stretch in comparison, but knowing what true love means and what it requires begs the question, "If we are truely passionate about someone or something, shouldn't we prove it by our actions?"

Day 22.......Its a New Day!

A new dawn, everyday is a chance to start over, a fresh start.  At Day 21, according to Joel Osteens book, Best Life Now, I should've formed a habit.  I think the habit is blogging my progress.  I need the exercise and healthy eating to be the next habit.  The exercise definately is coming easier...I enjoy and look forward to my workouts. I am looking forward to grabbing healthy food options as a habit.  It will happen.....I have faith.  

Philippians 4:13 (Amplified Bible)
13I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me [I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him Who [a]infuses inner strength into me; I am [b]self-sufficient in Christ's sufficiency].

Day 21 & Week 3 Overview......Food is a Factor

This week I did great with getting up early and working out.  I definately think I can make that part of my new lifestyle. However; food choices and amounts are still problem areas, that I need to work on.  So I will confess my scripture verse with fill in the blanks for the week.....



  Cheezits, sechwan mango chicken, potato chips, potato salad is permissible (allowable and lawful) for me; but Cheezits, sechwan mango chicken, potato chips, potato salad is not helpful (good for me to do, expedient and profitable when considered with other things). Cheezits, sechwan mango chicken, potato chips, potato salad is lawful for me, but I will not become the slave of anything or be brought under its power.

This confession is taken from 1 Corinthians 6:12 (Amplified Bible) all things underlined are added by me for my benefit, these additions are not meant to add to or delete from the actual text of the bible.


At weigh-in this week I gained 2 lbs. (I am hoping that it is water weight) never the less I did go over board on some of the above mentioned foods.
Since food is a factor for me it is time to get serious beyond the last serious, that turned out to be seriousness taken lightly.  I WILL JOURNAL my foods!

Day 20........Other Bloggers

Last night I found several inspiring blogs and a great site for bloggers, CSAHM Christian Stay at Home Moms http://csahm.com/blogs-by-moms/ .  One blog that stood out contained a verse that I can relate to  1 Corinthians 6:12 (Amplified Bible)


12Everything is permissible (allowable and lawful) for me; but not all things are helpful (good for me to do, expedient and profitable when considered with other things). Everything is lawful for me, but I will not become the slave of anything or be brought under its power.


I am going to use this verse whenever I feel a temptation to eat more than or what I know I shouldn't.

Day 19......Say No to Tired

Last night I could barely keep my eyes open. A full day of family activities, and preparing for a new fall schedule mentally and physically drained me yesterday. Despite being tired I got on the treadmill at a snails pace........had high energy music playing in my headset......then it happened either the music or the knowledge that I wasn't going to let "tired" win took over and I got enough energy to get in my 200 calorie burn. Yeah!

This morning, I plan on walking with a friend while my daughter is in her first day of preschool. Which will be my morning workout. It's Fall and I am excited.

Day 18........Press On

It is so easy to slip back into a comfort zone. It's food that seems to effect my attitude and emotions like a false comfort that I crave. I need to redirect that comfort to the only One who can satisfy.

I cancelled my satellite TV last week, and it has been the best thing for me. I have found more time to exercise, also more quiet time for myself. I also got through a book that has taken me 2 years, and last year I got the book on audio. I have to laugh at myself that it took turning off the TV for me to finish a audio book. However; finishing it reminded me how much I love reading books and how much I enjoy the series that I am 2 books away from finishing ( The Left Behind series, Tim LaHaye/Jerry Jenkins).

The treadmill I look forward to! In the morning I can usually only manage a 20 min. walk, at night it's become a great release to get on the treadmill and get inspired through music to burn lots of calories. I appreciate the instant gratification a workout brings.

I am on a role and I refuse to lose. I posted a note in a visible location for me to see everyday that reads...."I am worth it, I love myself too much to stay this way." To encourage myself that today is another opportunity to improve and I am worth it!

Day 13 & 14+Week 2 Overview....Going with the Flow!

I think the best rules are no rules just goals. I have not gotten up early the last two mornings but I am reaching my goal. I am staying focused not getting discouraged just going with the flow! I burned 300 calories on the treadmill today which amounts to the extra piece of pan pizza I ate, but I enjoyed it and am enjoying the workout. I am now at a 4 mph speed and at a slight jog. Lovin the sore buns and thighs. More than anything this discipline has to be a lifestyle change to be and stay healthy, I am still learning the new lifestyle that will best suit me.

I lost 2.6 lbs......Yeah! I needed to see results.